So what does a 14 year old have to say about the Nokia N80?

Jon Arnold is a freaking awesome dad. He is apart of the Nokia (NYSE: NOK) Blogger Relations program and for some strange reason he decided to let his 14 year old son, Max, review the Nokia N80.

Let’s see what we can learn. My comments will be in bold:

Other than the N70, this is the first phone I’ve tried that has a second lens to it. I must say, though, this is the worst idea ever.

[The second "lens" is used for video calling. We don't have such services in the US, but it's mildly popular overseas.]

The second lens is 0.3 Megapixels, whereas the main one has 3 megapixels, as well as flash and a distance toggle (the switch where one side is a mountain and one side is a flower… I don’t know the proper term for that) all put together so that the phone is held sideways by default, with a button on top so it feels even more like a regular camera (that 16:9 view always helps for taking better photos!).

[The flower icon is called "macro," it's for when you want to take pictures of something extremely close to the lens. By close I mean less than a foot. The mountain icon is called "landscape."]

you can accidentally hold down the camera button, and hold it down long enough, and you will hear a nice, obnoxious shutter sound followed by a big booming flash in the palm (NSDQ: PALM) of your hand

[That's what I would call a problem. I never tried a N80 so I can't comment.]

You can even play a game like the included Snake and Card deck while on a call, so suppose you are on hold waiting for a customer service representative during bottleneck hour, or your Mother-in-law decides to call again, at least you have something to do while you say “uh-huh” and “interesting! I’m sure glad i have you to inform me about this!” into the mic every five seconds while feeding the snake and looking for that final ace to win the game.

[Multitasking is flipping sweet! I know exactly how you feel. I know a few girls who can talk nonstop. Loading up Opera Mini or checking my email while I give them the occasional "reallly?!" or "tell me more" is a life saver.]

Like all phones in the N-Series, it takes a long time to boot up. Thirty seconds! My Nokia 6103 can start up and shut down twice in that time!

[It's a more complex operating system, therefore it needs that extra time. I remember owning Palm PDA's when I was your age that had 0 start up or shutdown time. They were instant.]

Bottom line: Make the casing all out of one material, so we can spare our ears, make the earpiece bigger, improve it or lose it with the second lens (i.e. Get flash), use the middle button on the navigation pad to take pictures, i mean, that’s how it works on most other phones, doesn’t it? Speed up the boot-up time, and find a more convenient way to place the keypad, or just don’t use the stupid prompt for whether or not to lock it.

[The video calling camera will never get a proper flash. It isn't really meant for picture taking. Using the middle button on the dpad to take pictures isn't implemented because Nokia is trying to get you to hold the N80 like you would a regular point and shoot digital camera. The boot time will be speed up in another version of S60, which means you'll have to ask your dad for another phone. As for the "lock" and "unlock" problem, I'm pretty sure there is an option in the menu for that.]

Now I know a 14 year old kid isn’t going to spend his money on a Nokia N80, but that doesn’t negate the fact that he’s probably had a cellphone for half a decade. He knows what he wants and there are certain things that just make sense to him and certain things that don’t.

I’m amazed at you Max. When I was 14 I was (and still am) chasing girls on my bike and getting into trouble. I didn’t even get a cellphone until I was in my last year of high school. Keep up the good work and always nag your dad to let you play with his latest toys.