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[NSFW] Friday Funnies: Samsung Releases Big F%$#&* Television, The Onion Reports

March 14, 2014 by Ian Kersey - Leave a Comment

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(Disclaimer: This article is satire, as is The Onion. Y’all probably know that, but wanted to let you know just in case.)

Thanks to The Onion, America’s Finest News Source, we now know the details of Samsung’s upcoming television offerings. It looks like Sammy has gone all out this year, producing some of the most massive TV sets ever conceived.

So, what are the specs for Samsung’s huge TV’s? According to an unnamed Samsung exec, the new TV’s are simply, “Really f#$%^g big. It’s super heavy, and boasts a gargantuan screen that’s at least a hundred f#$%^&g inches for all we know.”

Pricing for the mammoth sets have yet to be announced, but we can expect it to cost a f#$%^g buttload of money and be available at every goddamn soul-sucking big-box retail store in America. The TV’s more than likely connect to that internet thingie where users will be able to watch every Matlock episode, ever, and could do that thing that’s like a telephone but with pictures and stuff.

We’ll keep you updated as more details roll out regarding Samsung’s big f@#$%ing TV’s. In the meantime, check out The Onion’s report below!


Samsung Releases New Big Fucking TV

via: The Onion

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